GALO: Do you feel that your experiences have given you something to build from when you are acting on stage or on film?

JB: Definitely. I feel like, as an actress, it has been a huge benefit for me because I can do a piece like Maniac and I can go to a deep, dark, lonely place because I’ve been there. Really, truly, I have been there — completely alone, begging someone not to kill me. Whether it was in that same way that my character Rita does in Maniac or not, I know what that actually feels like. When I go to that guttural, deep, moaning, screaming place, it is a real place. In that moment, I’m not thinking like I’m back in 1974, but because I have accessed those feelings before, I can bring them back.

GALO: Most people wouldn’t dare tackle any more traumatic experiences, willingly that is, after surviving what you went through. But most recently, as you yourself stated, you starred in Maniac, a film that required you to be bound, tortured and eventually scalped at the hands of a fictional madman? What made you take on that role? Did it act as another form of therapy?

JB: Yes, it was for that reason, but also because I am an actress and I had never done this genre before. This is the first horror film I have done, and it’s something I have always wanted to do to, sort of, fill in all the blanks of all the things you want to do and try. I was also fascinated with this character that I play, who, on the surface, at least to me, seemed to be putting on this front. She acts like a complete b—h while she is representing an artist who takes pictures of mannequins, for which she makes a lot of money off of, but still finds the whole thing kind of creepy. She is two-faced on some level, but to me, that kind of snarky personality is covering up a secret. There must be a secret past for her, Rita, my character, to act that way. I don’t believe people are generally coming from a place of self-confidence when they are making fun of others. She is just full of something much deeper, which is where I can draw from as a woman who had her own deep, dark secret. That is a complex foundation, and that is the kind of characters I want to play.

I want to play complex people because most people are. There is a whole story behind Rita’s [façade], which, of course, isn’t explored on screen — it is just my own thing, my own process as an actress. And going to those places is therapeutic as an actress because you are able to feel those kinds of emotions so intensely. You can look at it, stare it in the face, scream at it and then put it back on the shelf. It’s about letting yourself be completely out of control, while at the same time knowing that you are completely in control of your emotions.

GALO: For this role, as Rita, you said you were intrigued by her complex nature. So how did you prepare for that complexity in the more intense scenes, one of which finds you hog-tied and tortured. How did you prepare for that, both mentally and physically?

JB: There was such a physical process and preparation for the role. I had to go to where they made all the physical prosthetic pieces that had to be created for my [torture scene], so that it looks exactly like my hair, my scalp and my head. I had to go through this process of having a cast taken of your head and having every strand of hair individually crocheted into a net piece, so that it looks like real hair. So, you’re going through a true process of makeup and hair and even the tube that must be inserted [into the cast] to pump the blood at the right moment. It is so technical, and there are so many layers and pieces that must come together so that it looks real on screen. That is a very physical process that requires you to take so many steps a couple of weeks before you even start to film. [As I was going through those steps], I was being mentally prepared for what the role requires. As for emotional preparation, there is a confidence level that comes to an actor that allows them to know, in the moment, that I will be able to access every needed emotion and that I am safe even though I am completely letting go. Emotionally, because of what I have been through in my life, I’m also at a place where I am completely confident and healthy, and ready to take on those emotions and allow them to be exposed. And in turn, know that at the end of it all, I will be fine.

The director, Franck [Khalfoun] and [actor] Elijah [Wood] were very conscience of how raw [my torture scene] is and they took great pains to make sure I had a comfort level that allowed me to then completely let myself go to the extreme. I mean, I did my own stunts. It was really me being held under the water for 30 seconds while struggling and being hog-tied on the bed.

GALO: Overall, did you find this role to be more emotionally draining than other roles you have had, because of its disturbing context?

JB: It actually was draining, emotionally and physically. When you go to any emotional place, whether it is in your real life or for a role on screen, it is draining. I needed a few days to recover and rest and to talk to my mom and dad on the phone, and to take a real bubble bath where I wasn’t being drowned [laughs]. I needed that. It is almost like you need to recuperate after being sick because it is emotionally and physically taxing on your body and mind.

GALO: After all these years of using acting as a method of therapy, do you feel you have overcome the trauma of your kidnappings? Or are they something that remains with you today?

JB: I do feel like I have moved beyond that experience defining my whole life. I also feel as though it has shaped my life. Those experiences that we have, never completely leave you; they are a part of you. The trick is to make sure the experience doesn’t destroy you. But that you can use it to maybe inspire and inform others to ignite their path to hope, to healing and to sharing their own stories so that other people don’t feel alone. Even if my story is really extreme — I mean the brainwashing was so out there that people won’t believe me — I don’t care anymore, because there are people who need my story to give them hope that they can move past [this]. There is a great life waiting for you and you just have to figure out how to not be stuck in a sad, lonely, dark place. And I definitely have moved past that. I am a hopeful, happy, grateful, love-my-life person. I just want to help others get there too. I know it is possible.

Featured image: Jan Broberg as Rita in “Maniac.” Photo Courtesy of: IFC Films.

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